Easier Said Than Done

I know it's best to try to leave your school life at school.  But, it is really hard.  I find myself thinking about my students a lot of the time, wondering what they're doing and if they're safe.  Two weekends ago, I had a strange feeling something was wrong and found out on Monday that one of my students had gotten into a very bad car accident.  Events like this make it even more difficult not to think about your students and not to worry about them.  I guess it's about finding that balance so that you actually have a life.  Because your students and school can easily take it over completely.

Field Trips Galore

I am so happy that this Friday we will have our last field trip for a while.  For the past three Fridays, there has been either a field trip or no school.  So, we have had only four day weeks.  The kids are so excited by Thursday, though, that it feels like we only have three days.  Trying to play catch up with students who are below grade level takes time and we are behind on the standards.  If there's anything I've learned from this experience it's that everything takes longer than you think it's going to.  And, there's always something happening that limits your instructional time.

Job for ME?!

At our seminar today, we talked about interviewing skills.  For the first time, it really hit me...this is IT!  Everything I've been working towards is finally almost here.  I can't believe I'm going to graduate and have my own classroom.  I'm excited.  But, at the same time, I wish I could be a student teacher forever!  I love my cooperating teacher and my students.  They're going to have to kick me out.  I might even have to be escorted off the property :)

Monster Math Rules!

So, throughout this whole internship experience, I've been coming up with all these great ideas.  Only to find out that they weren't great at all.  I get super excited about some lesson I've designed, thinking the kids will love it.  And then, they hate it.  Well, not this time!  I created an activity that required students to add and multiply decimals.  They had to purchase different body parts and put them together to create the scariest possible monster.  Each body part cost a different amount and their complete monster had to have a total price tag of between $10 and $12.  The students loved it!  I got some really awesome, elaborate monsters.  Although, none of them were too scary.  I only did the activity with the algebra class because the other classes had only been working on multiplying and dividing decimals, not adding.  But, I let the other classes judge the contest.  Finally, success!!!

Deja Vu

One of my biggest frustrations in my career as a Chick-fil-A manager was a phenomenon I like to call back talking.  Not back talking as in people talking back to me.  But, back talking as in people talking in the back (part of the store) and behind other people's backs.  There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't hear employees talking bad about other employees, managers talking bad about other managers, employees talking bad about managers, or managers talking bad about employees.  I tried never to take part in those conversations.  Yet, sometimes I found myself in situations where I was almost forced to take part.

Well, today I experienced the middle school equivalent.  I guess there were some important people visiting the school today.  And, apparently, some teachers got told that they weren't doing certain things correctly and needed to make changes.  The timing of events must have been off.   The teachers felt like the only reason anything was said to them was because of the visitors and that the administrators just wanted to act like they were doing everything right.  So, I was sitting-in on an unofficial team meeting, essentially forced to listen to some teachers bad-mouthing a particular administrator for some things he/she said.  All I kept thinking was the same thing I used to think at my former job..."Do you have to say that HERE?"  I mean, of course people are going to get on other people's nerves.  And of course, sometimes you just need to vent.  But, do you really think it's appropriate to vent in the workplace?  Where the people you are bad-mouthing might be just right outside the door?

I hope I never fall into this whole mess.  Whatever happened to the old saying..."If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

Work Overload

I'm on the verge of having a nervous breakdown.  I take over Algebra I tomorrow, meaning I will officially be teaching all of my CT's classes.  Plus, I just found out that lesson plans will now be due on Thursdays for the following week.  So, essentially this means I have two sets of lesson plans to plan for two weeks as I have zero time after school to work on plans.  I was in Myrtle Beach yesterday to present at a conference on "encouragement in education" (supposed to look good on my resume)...well, I'm not feeling very encouraged.  It took me four plus hours to get home because of bad weather.  I have been working on plans nonstop this morning since 10 AM and I'm not even finished with half of the plans for Pre-Algebra.  Making those stupid SMARTBoard lessons takes FOREVER.  Not to mention all the worksheets, handouts, etc.  I don't know how I'm ever possibly going to get all of this done.

Getting into the Groove

So, last week was a million times better than the week before.  I think the kids are really starting to respect me as an authority figure.  I am teaching every class except for Algebra.  We have done lots of different hands on and group activities and I have been really pleased with their performance.  I have also taken over all of the grading for the classes I am teaching and have created all their tests, worksheets, homework, etc.  I'm starting to feel a little more like a real teacher.  The work load is intense, but seeing those light bulbs go off makes it all worth it.

The VERY Ugly

Last week, I started teaching one Pre-Algebra class.  It was going pretty well, so I figured why not go ahead and teach the other one too.  On Tuesday and Wednesday I taught both classes and felt really good about it.  My cooperating teacher's only suggestion was to "demand their attention", meaning that sometimes I was talking over them instead of waiting for them to be silent.  Unfortunately, my CT had a death in the family and informed me that she had to be out on Thursday and Friday.  She told me there would be a substitute, but I could do most of the teaching.  This also meant she would have to miss the open house on Thursday night and that I would take that over too.  Silly me, I thought it would be no problem.  I was worried about meeting the parents at the open house and not at all worried about the teaching.  Surely, I could "demand their attention".  Well, I demanded...and demanded...and demanded...to no avail.  Thursday was awful.  I thought about giving the "behavior makeover" forms out that my CT uses, but I would have had to give one to almost everyone in the class.  They were testing me...REALLY testing me.  And I can understand, I mean they wanted to see how much they could get away with.  Yet, I was really blown away by the complete and total lack of respect they showed me and the substitute.  Interestingly enough, the open house went great and I actually really enjoyed talking to some of the parents (of course, none of the parents I wanted/needed to see showed up).  After the open house, I went home and thought about what on earth I was going to do with these kids on Friday.  I felt bad because I knew there were a select few who were actually on task and doing what they were supposed to be doing.  I decided to give them a pop quiz on Friday.  The quiz was IDENTICAL to the warm up that I gave them and went over in detail on Thursday.  So, I thought the ones who had been paying attention would easily make a 100.  In the Pre-Algebra classes after I collected the quiz and explained to them why I had given it to them, most of the students really turned it around and their behavior improved. In the Algebra class, on the other hand, it didn't phase them at all.  I know I shouldn't lose my cool, but I lost it.  I didn't go ballistic or anything...I just gave up.  I assigned them their homework, told them to start working on it and said I wasn't going to help them or answer anymore of their questions because I was sick of trying to talk over them.  I've always said I love a good challenge, but I wasn't expecting one this good!  Monday should be interesting...

The Ones I Worry About

I don't know how teachers with kids of their own do it!  It is amazing how quickly you feel so bonded with the students and begin to care about them as if they were your own flesh and blood.  I can't help thinking about where these students will be five or ten years from now and wondering what impact I might have on them.  There are those that I know will be okay.  I see something in them that makes me believe that no matter what challenges life throws their ways, they will persevere.  But there are others that I really worry about.  Some have already given up, have already decided that they are destined for failure and that there is no point in even trying anymore.  Like Student B who simply doesn't do anything and mutters under his breath how much he hates school.  Some are far too easily influenced by their peers.  Like Student J who tries to hide his intelligence to fit in with his class clown wannabe friends.  Some have absolutely no confidence in their abilities.  Like Student D who when prompted always tells me exactly how to solve the problem, but never writes anything down until he sees the teacher go over it.  Some can't handle stress well and seem to crack under the slightest amount of pressure.  Like Student T who freaks out any time there is a minor change in routine and becomes enraged when asked to correct a simple mistake.  Some are quiet, very quiet.  Like Student M who nods and smiles, but rarely says a word.  Some don't fit in.  Like Student B who brought a knife to school last year because the other kids were picking on him.  These are the students who I worry about...not whether or not they will be successful in math class, but whether or not they will be successful in life.

Phasing In

Tomorrow, I will officially take over Mrs. Jenkins-Scott's 4th period pre-algebra class and I could not be more excited!  I have finally learned all of the students' names and feel pretty comfortable working with them.  So far, I have mainly been walking around making sure students are on task and assisting them when needed.  But, I am gradually starting to take on other responsibilities as well such as grading papers and taking attendance.  Although I know that the students are used to my presence in the classroom, my biggest concern is the transition.  I am not worried about the content or the actual instruction part, but just about how the kids will respond to me as I move from the observer to the learning facilitator.  Already the students seem confused at times about who to ask if they can go to the bathroom, for example, and I can see this problem being amplified as I begin really teaching.  Luckily, I have an amazing cooperating teacher who I know will help to make my role more clear to the students!